1. Vision and Purpose: Ask a man about his vision and purpose for his life. If he can’t answer or gets offended, he’s not ready. A man doesn’t need a partner without a purpose or assignment. Women might try to give men a vision, but it’s something he must possess on his own. Only when he has a clear vision should he seek a woman to help him realize it.
2. Commitment Readiness: If a man says he wants a committed relationship, believe him. No matter how well you cook, clean, pamper, or please him, if he’s not ready for a relationship, nothing you do will change that. If he says he’s only looking for friends, take his word for it.
3. Respect for Women: Ask him about the women in his life—his mother, sisters, and exes. If he uses derogatory terms like “bitch,” it’s a red flag. If his mother’s opinion will always outweigh yours, that’s another warning sign. He must be willing to leave the past behind to truly commit to you.
4. Patience with Intimacy: A good man won’t pressure you for sex when you first meet. You are not a car to be test-driven. If a man wants to test your body, emotions, and feelings upfront, it’s a sign to walk away.
5. Role Models: Every good man has someone he looks up to, someone he fears disappointing. If he says “no one,” be cautious—he might be too proud to be a good leader. The person he admires speaks volumes about his character.
6. Seeing Your True Worth: When asked what he sees in you, it’s okay if his first answer is about your appearance—men are visual. But he should also recognize the deeper qualities that make you who you are. He won’t protect what he doesn’t value, so he must see and appreciate your true worth.
7. Keeping Promises: A good man keeps his promises. If he consistently fails to call when he says he will, cancels dates, shows up late, or plays emotional games, take note. These are clear signs he doesn’t value, love, or care about you.
8. Proud Introductions: How a man introduces you reveals a lot about the relationship. Steve Harvey says if a man introduces you without a title or just as a friend, you likely have nothing substantial. A man who loves you will give you a title—his lady, woman, fiancee, or wife.
9. Avoiding Derogatory Language: A good man doesn’t frequently use terms like “bitch,” “hoe,” “nagging,” or “golddigger.” Men often use these terms to lower a woman’s expectations of them. If he constantly calls women “golddiggers,” he may be unwilling to provide much in the relationship.
10. Prioritizing Your Happiness: A good man puts you first. He cares about your concerns and wants to address them. He strives to make you happy and values your opinion. Providing for those he loves is in his DNA, and if he loves and cares for you, he’ll provide without limits.
11. Financial Responsibility: A good man takes pride in paying for dinner, movie tickets, or other outings. If he insists on paying, it’s a sign he values and respects you. When a man genuinely cares, he’ll go the extra mile to impress and do right by you.
12. Self-Awareness: A good man knows who he is, his job title, and his financial standing. He must have a clear understanding of these things to focus on a relationship and provide the love and support his partner needs.
13. Moral Integrity: Being a man of God doesn’t automatically make him a good mate, but having strong morals does. If he’s patient, kind, unselfish, and righteous, he has the potential to be a good partner. A man with a quick temper or frustration issues may not make the best mate.
14. Truthfulness: A good man lives in truth, both with himself and others. He’s in tune with a higher spirit and believes in accountability for his actions. This type of man is responsible and holds himself to a high standard.
15. Commitment to Marriage: A good man doesn’t keep his partner as a girlfriend or “baby mama” for years on end. He marries his woman and takes pride in making her a proper lady in the eyes of society. He loves and respects her too much to do otherwise.
16. Pride in Being a Good Man: When you meet a good man, he takes pride in his role as a partner and as a role model for others. He knows he’s unique and valuable, so when you find Mr. Good Man, treat him accordingly. Remember, you must also be fruitful to capture and keep a good man.
17. Self-Love: Finally, self-love is crucial. If you don’t love yourself, no man—no matter how great—can ever love you fully. Without self-love, everything else becomes pointless.
This is the essence of a good man. Recognize these traits, and when you find them, appreciate and nurture the relationship you have with such a man.